Unhappily divorced dating dating coach columbus ohio

But the data presented by the National Marriage Project (P 67 Fig 4) shows the opposite occurring: Note that men and women were both happier with their marriages feminists “fixed” marriage.This is especially surprising given the reduced social pressure for couples to marry following unexpected pregnancy.Abortion, readily available birth control, and acceptance of single motherhood have all but eliminated the “shotgun wedding”.

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One of the most common and typically unchallenged assumptions about divorce is that despite all of the destruction it causes it at least makes people happier.

Specifically, there is a feminist presumption that divorce makes happier.

Given the unfair nature of divorce laws and family court and the incentives the system offers to encourage women to divorce, this at first glance would seem like a reasonable assumption.

Divorce should presumably drain off the most unhappy marriages, leaving the average married couple happier.

They also had lower average household incomes than unhappy spouses who stayed married. In most respects, unhappy spouses who divorced and unhappy spouses who stayed married looked more similar than different (before the divorce) in terms of their psychological adjustment and family background.

One might assume, for example, that unhappy spouses who divorce and those who stay married are fundamentally two different groups; i.e., that the marriages that ended in divorce were much worse than those that survived. Unhappy spouses who divorced reported more conflict and were about twice as likely to report violence in their marriage than unhappy spouses who stayed married.

However, marital violence occurred in only a minority of unhappy marriages: Twenty-one percent of unhappily married adults who divorced reported husband-to-wife violence compared to nine percent of unhappy spouses who stayed married.

Yet even with fewer presumably bad marriages entering the system and more unhappy ones exiting, married men and women are both less likely to report being very happy in their marriage. But this trend in itself isn’t proof that those who divorce aren’t made happier by it.

What we need to evaluate is whether unhappily married people who divorce are happier than unhappily married people who choose to remain married.

A team of sociologists lead by a professor from the University of Chicago has done this, and their findings destroy the conventional wisdom on divorce (press release and full study).

From the Executive Summary: Does this mean that most unhappy spouses who divorced would have ended up happily married if they had stuck with their marriages? Unhappy spouses who divorced were younger, more likely to be employed and to have children in the home.

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